I Wish I Was a Fish

I wish I was a fish
swimming in my friend’s backyard
My fins would splash and splish
but I can’t swim out too far

But I’ll always be home
where there’s sapphire stones
and slimey sand toads
nothing around me is unknown

I want to see the ocean
Though my eyes would fill with plastic debris
Salt sinks slowly in my skin
As my fins guide me through this sea

This sea of corals and reefs
Kelp taller than the sky
and depths so deep
who knows what you’ll find

I want to swim with the dolphins
and make friends with the seals
We’ll sing songs as we spin
and hope we aren’t someone’s next meal

Then I’ll dive down in the dark trench with a flashlight and fear
My fish friends say “Don’t go there! You’ll drown!”
“We’re scared you’ll disappear!”
I tell them “I’ll be fine! I might even come back up in a gown”

They say “We’ll wait here for you to return”
I thank them and smile and dip down into the ditch
The deeper I go, the more my stomach turns
My body feels heavy and my scales start to itch

Maybe this wasn’t a good idea
But I swim down anyway because I want it to be a good idea

Deeper and deeper, my heart beats faster
I feel like I’m being squashed by rocks
A light in the distance, something familiar
Closer and closer, something talks

Giant jaws and teeth formed into a frown
Beady glass spheres, crystal clear
His soulless expression sees right through me
As if I’m a window and he’s the intruder plotting to enter my house when I’m unaware

My heart falls out of my chest and sinks to the bottom of the trench
Maybe this deep sea life isn’t for me
I swim my way up but it hurts like hell
I feel like an anchor
My scales feel like they’re going to rip from my flesh
And my eyes are going to pop from their sockets
And the blood in my veins will seep through my skin
Turning the water a catastrophic crimson
The dark abyss I’m in is endless
No matter which way I go, it is darker than night
Not quite pitch black, but more like a deep blue-violet bruise

No matter how loud I scream
My voice leaves my throat and it tries to climb its way up,
But it’s no use. It sinks down to the bottom
I can’t cry tears because fish can’t cry
But I want to
My body aches as I long for my pond
I’m stuck in an abyss
Surrounded by darkness and fear and things I don’t know
This trench has a grip on my tail fins that I can’t break free from

If there’s anything I can wish
For, it’d be to swim in my friend’s backyard
My fins would splash and splish
And I can’t swim out too far

Actually
Maybe I don’t wish I was a fish